My Whiny Week in Review

The disruption of the week has been that I spent the week in Union Grove attending a certification course for advanced wound care. I learned a lot this week, some of it even pertained to wounds....

1) I could never, ever, ever work somewhere where I had to commute.
Many of you know that my usual commute to work is 1.75 miles. Sometimes I drive, sometimes I take my scooter, and sometimes (when there is not a lot of school traffic) I walk. This week I commuted 127 miles round trip every day. There are a million windy twisty, rural roads, which totally suck to navigate. And the Interstate is not much better.
And then there is all the dead air on the radio stations. The rate a radio station gets reception is inversely proportionate to the degree to which I am enjoying it. We'll just call that Wimmer's Law.
Is it wrong that I entertained myself by evaluating all roads and crossroads by how fun (or not fun) they would be to bike on? Come to think of it, maybe if I had biked to the class, I would have enjoyed the ride a little more.

2) Every road in Eastern Wisconsin is apparently always under construction. ALWAYS.
I went to the same place every day. I was not ever able to take the same route twice and often my way home was different than the way I got there in the morning. Off ramps and on ramps were closed with no notice from day to day. Traffic was re-routed due to construction, accidents, tree removal services, changing light bulbs in the traffic lights, ..... you name it and a road block was thrown in my way. I have never in my life been re-routed so many ways and forced to punt on directions.

3) The GPS unit is possessed by something that seriously wants to mess with my tiny head.
I was endlessly given directions that I KNEW were not the fastest or best way to go, and sometimes roads did not show up on the map, or it tried to take me the wrong way down one way streets, mostly in the Burlington area. And let me tell you that the little guy who tells you what to do has a bad case of Tiny Man Syndrome. He is BOSSY and gets really really pissed if you don't do what he tells to.

4) My family gets WAY to much pleasure from me getting a ticket.
Thursday morning, Exit 29 on I-43 was closed for construction. I read the sign the day before and planned to get off at Exit 28...... which was closed too and didn't know it. So I got off at the next exit after 29, which routed me all over the frickin place. I would through tiny town after tiny town and wound all over the place. As I pulled into the tiny town of Honey Creek (Population 50) I thought "what a quaint little town......where the hell am I? And how am I going to get back to where I need to go?"
as I pondered it, looking all over the place for signage, driving 55 mph, I noticed that the speed limit dropped to 25. I never saw a warning it would happen. As I lifted my foot from the accelerator, I saw barney Fife sitting in his squad running radar. I held my breath and as I passed by, the lights started to spin. I still had no idea where I was.
He swaggered up the car window, looking every bit like Jackie Gleason in Smokey and the Bandit, complete with the little mustache (no lie!). He asked where I was headed, which cascaded into a blubbery meltdown about how I was lost, frustrated, and just basically trying to get the hell out of Honey Creek and to where I was actually headed and was now going to be late getting to. He asked if I had ever had a speeding ticket before, and I told him truthfully I had not.
As he walked back to his squad car, I was crossing my fingers that he felt bad for the lost, crying lady, with a 25 year clean driving record.
Before long he came back. He handed me a ticket for going 43 in a 25 zone, gave me some la-ti-dah speech about protecting school kids, and said he did me the "favor" of ticketing me for 43 since he had clocked me at 44 first and it was apparent to him I was in the process of slowing down (Um, thanks. Makes no difference in my ticket, points, or insurance, but um, yeah.)
Then he gave me directions to get to Union grove. I was about 3 minutes away. Rats.
Needless to say, I have taken a fair amount of crap from Mike and the boys. Bastards.

5) The content may change, but every class/seminar is basically the same.
There are basically the same few people in every class ever.
There is the lady who asks the same dumb questions all day long. I know they say there are no stupid questions, but trust me there definitely are dumb ones. And it makes you look stupid for asking.
There is the lady that has an example to share about "what our facility does" in every situation. The story is never short, barely on topic, and just ties up my time.
There is the person who always says "YES!" when the teacher asks if we need to take a break, even if w just took one like 20 minutes ago. Really? I think we should be ok without one....
There is the person who talks to the presenter at every break using every big word she knows on the topic and inserts her opinion on everything throughout the presentation. She.Knows.Everything. which makes me wonder - if you know freaking everything and want to argue with the presenter about the content because you are always right, why did you take the class? If you know it all, you should just take the test for $75 and save your employer $4925 for the certification course! But then you would not get to show off how smart you are. (She actually asked one day "So are You lying or is the workbook lying because the workbook says ___ and you just said ___.." I think my jaw hit the floor.)
And then there is the person who just sits back and stays uninvolved, and wants to get through the day as quickly as possible, doesn't make a lot of conversation and gets annoyed more easily every minute she has to hang with all the others. That would be me. Miss anti-Social.

6) I could not do something where I had to do the same thing over and over again.
If I had to deal with all those people in every class day after day after day, I think I might poke some eyes out with a sharp #2 test pencil. Seriously. Give me a good old week on the nursing unit with something different to do every day, makes me much happier. And sane.

7) The more I have to sit still, the crankier I get.
By lunch time, I could not stand to be still anymore. Most of the days I was able to walk around the grounds for 45 minutes or so, which helped a bit, but it was jut not enough to totally take the edge off. By the time I got home I was a royal witch.
It was kind of a strange place to walk around since it was also the grounds for one of the state prisons, so I was walking around lovely brick buildings with little gardens, all surrounded by high fences topped with coiled barbed wire. Kinda creepy.

*****************************************************************************

Anyhow, the week is done and I am glad. I took my certification test today and in 4-6 weeks I fully expect to be able to add WCC to my credentials ("Wound Care Certified"). And the best part is I don't have to go to the recert class again for 5 YEARS!!!
Now I will just have to pay my ticket to Racine County as a reminder of all the fun I had there.

(I forgot to mention this but during all the fun of looking at grody pictures and learning all about sterile maggot therapy and other biosurgical interventions, I also managed to break off one of my teeth. It's a molar and it's not painful but I have managed to rub my tongue on it enough times to make the tongue bleed. Best part? I can't get into the dentist until Monday because I was too far away to get to the office before it closed ........ That's just choice.)

Feeling fat, and not with a PH

Iron weekend has come and gone. For the week before IMWI and the week following IMWI, I have done pretty much nothing. i think I got in 1 swim and a one hour-ish run, then pretty much nothing too taxing. Plus, I have been on the see-food diet for the past week while I was off work to use some vacation days up. I think I ate one of everything, sometimes two.

Now we are sitting on the sofa, kicking back as it has rained for like 3 solid days, and trying to work on a training plan for the next 52 weeks.

I am also working on a plan to lose the last 25 pounds AGAIN that I have let creep back on in the past year. I am feeling FAT but not in a good way. Capital F as in "F'ing Fat"...... fat with an F, not PHAT.

Tried the Wii Fit this week. Man is that fun! But my abs hurt from the balance activities so bad the next day that it hurt to breathe, let alone move. I obviously need a little more core work than I've been getting lately.

Technical Difficulty - please help

OK here is the deal.
I love to upload my Garmin stuff to bimactive.com.
I figured out how to do the zip file thing, which was no small feat for me.
Now it won't accept my uploads because the zipped file size is too big.
I emailed tech support a copy of my file per their request to find the problem and send a solution. Here is the answer I got:

Hi Jenny,
The uncompressed file is too large for our servers to handle. Please split your activities into two
files and zip those and upload. Let me know how it goes.
Cheers,
jon

I emailed back asking exactly how I would do that and threw myself on their mercy to help the technically inept. Here was the response:

The way I would do this is using the Training Center software, select a date range to export that is half what
you initially created and then do the other half into a new file name. Zip both of these files you have exported
separately and try uploading them.
-jon

Yeah. I still have not a clue, can't figure it out. Anyone have any thoughts or care to laugh at my attempts?

Reflections on the Big Pig Gig - Pigman 70.3

Saturday morning Mike and I headed to BFE Iowa (formerly known as Cedar Rapids) to get all signed in for the Pigman Long Course Triathlon (70.3). After taking the pups to Bonnie's, my new pet sitter - who was awesome BTW- we were off. I could not imagine a more boring drive...... For what seemed like days we wandered along Hwy 11 towards Dubuque through 3 million little towns with a combined total population of 12.

When we finally crossed the Mississippi River and got into Dubuque, I waited patiently for the scenery to change, we were in Iowa after all. Somewhere along the line, I got it stuck on my head that Iowa was flat and we were headed for downtown Pancake to race there. Illinois is pretty flat, so is Indiana, and Nebraska and a whole shitload of other states in the general Midwest area......

W.T.F. ?? I thought to myself as the terrain seemed to get hillier and hillier. Where are my flats?? You must be kidding! I watched that last couple hours to Cedar Rapids in utter amazement.

We finally arrived at the Marriot for the "expo" which was actually a place where you got your packet and shirt, and Gear West had 1 table and a rack of tri clothes to check out. Not exactly what I was expecting.

We got checked in and talked to Tri-Dummy who was still a ways away driving in with the whole family. We decided to check out the water at the lake and then drive the bike course. The water was nice. The bike course not so much. Rough roads, heavy traffic, gravel everywhre, a temporary bridge through road construction, you name it it was out there. The kicker for me was the roads. Anything paved is a highway with no shoulder, any other less traveled farm roads are gravel - no shit. Iowan bikers have gotta be hard core. I was nervous about the bike now, not so much of the hills but the traffic.

We went to supper with Blogland Superstar Tri-Dummy and his lovely wife Aimee and their kids. It was a great time, with great food. What fun! and the kids - very funny and so well behaved! It was awesome. (I do have pictures, but was asked not to post them. It DID really happen).

Back at the hotel we got ourselves together for race day. The Marriott nickel and dimes you for EVERYTHING, and provides not much - no fridge, no microwave, no WiFi (without depositing an arm and a leg onto your bill.). The alarm clock? Holy crap, it was so complicated we never did get it figured out and it never went off in the morning. Watched the marathon on the Olympics and went to bed.

Race day was there before you know it. My eyeballs pooped open at 4:40 and we got our cracks out of the sack, got checked out, and we were off to the park.

Got set up in transition quickly and found out that we were wetsuit legal for the day - SWEET. Mike and I were in the same wave which really was ideal. We got our wetsuits on and headed to the beach, hopping in to get acclimated to the water temp. We took a few strokes out and I said to Mike that we were just sitting there, where we couldn't touch, and he was NOT sinking, just floating, hoping that was the reminder that would help him calm down.

The Swim:

We were in the first wave after the elites with a single file time trial start into the water. I swam steady just ahead or next to Mike, then I got ahead a little bit and kept an eye back for him for a while longer. wasn't long til we rounded the buoy and were on the second leg of the triangle. I got caught up for a while in a pack of swimmers, then moved to the outside a little for some breathing room. I saw a big yellow buoy to my right and mistakenly thought it was the corner, swimming over to it and realizing too late that it was the halfway marker. I took a quick punch in the jaw from the swimmer I cut off to get to the fake turn buoy and kept it going. Finally reached the beach and tried to remember to take off my cap and goggles first thing so I wouldn't look as dorky in my pictures this time (you know, the important stuff....).

Up the beach to transition, I was changing and heard Mike behind me saying "I am SO proud of myself..... I just swam a mile and a quarter....I did it...." and I smiled to myself at that. How cool.

The Bike:

I took off on the bike and out of the park. I got a couple miles and realized not only was this a hillier bike than anticipated, it was also WINDY! awesome.

Mike passed me about mile 8, and about mile 20, TriDummy trucked on by me. There were several railroad tracks (a/k/a bottle launchers judging by the carnage on the other side of the tracks), rumble strips in the road, and the metal grate construction bridge was especially interesting. Everything on this course was up or down, no flats and I do think that there was way more ups than downs, although I know logically that is not possible.

There were plenty of bottle drops and the volunteers were great. I saw nothing but beverages on the bike course - would have been nice to have a banana or something but whatever.

The traffic? every bit as bad as I feared. Lots of near misses and scariness. About 8 miles from the end, there were 2 cars coming towards me from the other direction and a lady coming up behind me. Instead of waiting, she tried to swerve out around me and nearly had a head-on collision right in front of me, close enough that I was looking all over frantically looking for somewhere to bail out to. The last stretch into the park was up a long steeper hill. It was long, and getting hot, and I felt like I had a saddle sore the size of Texas. About a mile from transition, the girl on the bike in front of me starter to weave, slow down, and then just fell over in a daze. There was an ambulance right there and as I passed her talking to them, she said I don't know what happened, I just fell over......

The Run:

What can I say? As I was going out, I saw the first folks coming in from the run to the finish. I saw Jaime from Endurance House fly by me towards the finish, then a couple other EH folks. It was really hot, and I thought to myself "Put a fork in me I'm cooked." That pretty much sums it up. I ran the downhills, walked the ups (not much of either, it was a really flat course) My plan was to run 2 minutes, walk 2 minutes on the run...... which quickly became run 1, walk 3......... then run 1 walk 5, then 6, then 7, .......... then "oh screw it what am I losing 3 minutes a mile maybe to walk? Yep I'm walking, it's just too f'ing hot, I am too tired, what idiot thought this race would be fun? Oh yeah, that was me..."

There were plenty of water stops. Only 1 porta on the run course ...... ONE. I took some water here and there, and always made sure to get some ice and throw it into my bra. Then I would munch on the ice chips from my shirt if I needed one (gross, I know, but I really didn't much care at that point).

Not only did this take place on the highway, but parts of it were covered in gravel, thus creating a huge cloud of dust to walk through. As I got near the half point, I saw Mike coming by the other direction and talked a couple seconds. I was feeling OK, just couldn't run. Every time I tried, my HR just skyrocketed to 160's or higher and I could not sustain it. The turnaround was at the top of the only other hill on the course. No timing mat. .....I told the guy standing there that had I known there wasn't a mat I would have cut the course long ago. He thought I was kidding, I thought I probably wasn't.

On the way back, I decided to count roadkill on the course, since there was so much of it I thought it was a perfect way to occupy my time. I lost count at 5.89 million piles of stinky bones, guts, and fur. Then I started trying to figure out what animal or reptile they used to be.

Got back to the park, way later than planned, but I finished. I mustered up a slog for the last half mile through the finish to save face (like I fooled anyone :-)

What was left to eat? warm yogurt and brown bananas, yummy. They must have had pizza judging from the dozens of empty boxes in the supply truck, but none left for me.

The Good:

- Got it done

- Got to spend an enjoyable meals with the TriDummy family. They are great!

- Swim was awesome, perfect water, nice course, felt great

The Bad:

- Hilly bike, awful roads. I was scared to death or getting hit, flatting out, or falling over the entire time.

- Forgot about chamois butter......nuff said.

- my run plain sucked

- Hot, hot, hot. Absolutely NO shade on the course which definitely took its toll.

- i forgot to strip off my bike clothes for the run, so I ended up wearing my tri shorts, topped with my heavy shebeest bike shorts, a heavy sports bra, a long tri tank, and a sleeveless bike jersey. I was a tad overdressed for the run.... duh.

Would I do the Pig again? The shirt was cool, and we are apparently being sent a really cool original print with our finish picture mounted on it. Despite that, I will never be back to BFE Iowa to race. No Way.

Would I do another 70.3? Yeah, I think I would. I do like the distance and I knowingly sacrificed a lot of bike fitness, and a TON of run fitness to focus on the swim. It was just what we needed to do or I never would have seen Mike toe the line in the first place. So, yes I would do it again, but not without spending more time and effort on biking, running, and bricks.

The goal for the next one would be to arrive at the finish line before the pizza is all gone and before the massage people have packed up. Or at least have someone save me a slice...... sounds like a good job for a sherpa- any volunteers??

Biting off more than you can chew isn't always a bad thing

Today we biked 1 loop if the Ironman Wisconsin course with Alison, Brian, and Jen, who are all on the cusp of an Ironman event (Brian and Alison are doing Wisconsin, Jen is doing Arizona). They have spent lots and lots of saddle time in the past few months, and while I started on a level playing field with Alison at the beginning of the summer, they are all far and above my abilities at the moment.

So of course when Alison suggested we do the IMWI course, I said sure, of course, love to. I have never done this course before but assumed it is much like everywhere else in Wisconsin I have ridden, so how different could it really be? Should we do one loop or two? Mike's response was he would rather do 1 loop (63 miles), but if we did 2 (85 miles) he and I would do an extra 15 somewhere to make it an even 100.

Fast forward to this morning. It was cold....I had on a tank top and bike shorts. It was chilly at 7am, but we hoped to warm up a bit as we went forward. Right from the start I felt like I was struggling. I was at the end of the pack, hanging on for dear life and more often than not I was falling off. We went up and down a ton of hills right from the start. Flying down hill on Whalen Road, I was smacked square in the mouth by some sort of mammoth bug that left me with a welt on my lip and bug guts on my teeth. They tasted awful. By the time I got to about 7.5 miles, I had nearly convinced myself that I couldn't do this today and I was going to turn around and nap in the car until everyone up ahead of me got back.

Problem: I realized Mike had the car keys. Rats, guess I keep going.

Thankfully for me, Jen doubled back a couple times to ride with m and offered up some encouragement. (She is a wicked fast biker by the way.) I was glad she scooped me up, it made a big difference to have someone turn around and realize I was still back there when everyone else was quickly biking out of sight.

Problem: I had no map and was constantly worried that I was going to be lost somewhere on the side of the road in BFE and no one would notice I was gone.

I kept running through what was going on ....... why was I going so slow? Why was I working so hard and not able to keep up? I had no explanation and was feeling just plain outbiked.

About mile 28-point-something, we pulled into a Kwik Trip in Mount Horeb felling just grouchy, bitchy, and hungry. I hadn't had anything to eat along the way yet, I was working too hard to keep up to even think about eating a bar or popping some beans. When I came outside after using the potty, Mike is messing with my bike. Uh, honey, you have been biking with your front brake on. So, I guess that explains some of the question of why am I putting forth so much effort and going nowhere. Here I thought I just sucked. Come to find out I only kinda sucked and had my brakes on.

Well, the front wheel was free-er after that, but my legs were feeling cooked. There were some nice screaming downhills coming up, some of them kind of technical with twists and turns. There were also plenty of hills. I got up the first of the Bitch Hills, but ended up walking at least a part of each of the last 2 hills of the Bitch Hill trio.

I was never so glad to get off my bike and be done as I was today. I was outbiked, overconfident, and underprepared. But I did it, and it's ta-done. Now the question is, would I be able to add another 50 miles to that loop and follow it up with a marathon?

Lessons Learned the Hard Way Today:

* IMWI bike course is way hillier that I gave it credit for and it totally kicked my ass. I need to get my butt on my bike more and spend plenty of time on hills, especially those ones I hate on Johnson Road.

* Um, check to make sure your bike is in proper order before you climb on and take off. Biking with your brakes on is flipping hard!

* Take your allergy medicine before taking a 4 hour ride in the country, past hay fields and farms. Makes for a much less snotty day.

* Chamois butter just makes your hiney feel greasy. And when you stop to pee you end up wiping it off the important parts anyway.

* I need to spend less time in the pool and more time on the bike and the run if I want to have a prayer of finishing in 17 hours.

* Bring a map so you can get back to the car if you get dropped!

* I bit off more than I can chew, but I made it through to the other side. Next time I will be ready.

What the French, Toast??

My sister commented that to me recently- Cracked.Me.Up. I have said it like a million times this weekend.

Should have been a pretty strong week for me this week. I held back on the bike because I knew I had the century on Saturday so didn't plan a lot of biking the rest of the week.

Got a Tri-Out in on Tuesday with SWAT. Showed up for a SBR night to find that Rockport was closed due to a poop accident in the pool (wasn't me- I swear!), so we did an hour bike instead of a swim and looped back to pick up any stray riders for the regular 6pm bike and Mike, Brian, and I drove over to Edison to swim instead of doing another longer hot bike that the rest of the group did. We came back to the park afterwards to try to pick up the SWATTies for the transition run, but ended up doing it by ourselves. It felt wrong to do the bike first, weird.

Thursday, we had planned to do the Aquathon (Swim-Run race) in Madison in the evening. CANCELLED due to blue-green algae in the lake, which is apparently toxic. What's a little poison between friends anyhow? Well, Alison and Mike cooked up our own little SWATquathon and we met up at Rockport for a swim, followed by a little longer run. It was kinda fun and I think we are going to make it a regular Thursday night adventure!

Planned run several other days, but frankly it has been so flipping HOT this week, I tried to wait out the heat after work and didn't get a lot done, except for the Tuesday Bike-Swim-Run, and a Swim -Run Thursday.

Saturday, we were set and ready for our first real century ride. We packed our bikes, We packed our gear. We packed some snacks. We packed the chamois butter. At 0500 everyone showed up in our driveway to caravan over to Elkhorn and ride a quick 100 miles (well not really quick....)

............ and then the phone rang. Day nurse called in sick and they couldn't find a replacement. So instead of riding my first century, I went to work for a 12 hour shift on top of my already completed 40 for the week (for free! I love being salaried!). I sent Mike on his way with the SWAT caravan and bummed on it all day, wondering how he was doing and worrying about him in the heat. I just knew without the boss around, he would probably fall off the edge of the earth or something.

So basically this week became just another rest week, with all my best laid plans going to shit right quick. Next week I need to kick it into high gear and get some serious miles in so I can take a taper week before Pigman.

Also cracking me up this weekend:

After Mike was done with his bike yesterday, he called me on the way home to give me an update. Went like this:
J: well how did it go?

M: OK, yeah it was a long ride. I'm just driving home. (groan) Oh man, I have to shit.

J: Do you need me to let you go?

M: No I'll tell you about the ride. Man, I gotta go, like right now. Anyway, it was a long ride. I had like 10 flats. Man there isn't like a McDonalds or a gas station anywhere around here.....

J: Are you OK?

M: Yeah, fine. Yeah, it was fun...... I am going to end up crapping my pants. Oh I remembered where I saw a porta. I'll talk to ya later.

CLICK.

It was really OK that he hung up. I was laughing so hard, I would have wet my pants and needed to find a bathroom too.

Save the Ho Ho: Cycling Shorts Review

TMI Alert: If you don't want to talk girly parts and sit bones, stop reading here. Consider yourself warned. :-)

So this summer, we have spent several long days in the saddle. Last summer we rode 20-30 miles 4-6 days a week. This summer, we are riding less days but longer distances, usually 40-60, with a 100 miler coming up this weekend. The extended sitting time is taking a painful toll on the lady parts area. About mile 30 lately, I start to consider maybe standing up for the last 20 or so miles of my ride to avoid sitting down any longer. I think it is boiling down to a problem with my shorts or a problem with my seat. Since I have been OK with the seat until the ride gets longer, it seems like the shorts are the best route to try fixing first.

A few weeks back, I read in Bicycling Magazine about some shorts called Trashy Cat Satin Shorts. They were rated as the best shorts under $100. So since the experts recommended them, I started there. Fit: REALLY small, like almost too tight small. I know I've put on 15 pounds since last summer, but yeah WAY WAY WAY tighter than they should have been. Comfort: Okay, but still some discomfort near the end of a long ride. Binding around the legs was uncomfortable. Bottom Line: They were OK, but not that much different that what I already had and would order a size up from what I would normally order. Um yeah, fat girls REALLY don't like to size UP...

So the research continued. Next up was a pair of shorts called the SheBeest SB Ultra D Shorts. I tried them out this weekend and they were really comfortable. The Century Stretch Pad gave good pressure relief and I had no real discomfort. Disadvantage: The pad is bulky and may not lend itself well to triathlon running, unless of course the expectation is you run in a diaper. Overall a good long distance short, but may cause some chafing later on the run.

Other pending reviews: I have also purchased a pair of Pearl Izumi UltraSensor Shorts (women's version with the 3D Elite chamois pad) and a pair of DeSoto 400 mile Shorts. I'll let you know how that goes. I suspect nothing will be perfect, but may each have their purposes.

I hope so. Changing saddles would be a much bigger ordeal for me. Too.Many.Choices. WAY.TOO.MANY.TO.CHOOSE.

All I really want is a pair of shorts that does make me feel like my ass could eat my seat...why is that so hard?

The SORT ice cream headache

Uh yeah. The water was still cold. ...... 50 degrees at the time we were there on the shores of Lake Michigan where we will swimin the morning.

I see blue lips in my future.

Spirit of Racine Triathlon 70.3.... Are we ready to rumble?

The big SORT weekend is upon us, the first of two scheduled half iron distance races.
So what have we done to alleviate our nervousness about the distance? Hopefully enough.

THE GOOD:
We have
* biked big (50+) every week for several weeks
* I put together a plan and tried to work it logically. (Mike poked fun at the plan.... we shall see who laughs last....)
*Swim, swim, swim swim. Lots of laps and drills in the pool, several trips to local lakes for OWS practice.

THE BAD:
As per my usual, I have not logged nearly enough run time. Why because I hate it. I love it, but I hate it if that makes sense. When I run, I am totally frustrated that my overall speed get slower and slower all the time. Last night during a particularly slow feeling stretch of road, I actually welled up with tears of frustration. I want to go faster, and yet I am slower this year than at any time last summer. Pisses me off and makes me not want to run. Seems like an exercise in stupidity to keep doing something with no improvement.

This Week's Final Tweaks:
* Sunday while we were in the neighborhood for Danskin, we tried to pre-swim the swim course. The beach is gorgeous, the water is clear. Oh and the water temp was 53 degrees. 5 minutes of swimming in it yielded numb feet and hands and a wicked ice cream headache. Now we added insulated neoprene swimcaps to our ensemble. Hopefully that does the trick.
* Used Danskin as transition practice and saw some small details I need to focus on to make that more streamlined.
* Tomorrow we are going to do the July Aquathon (swim/run race) as practice so Mike gets in a group open water swim and some wetsuit practice.
* Watch the water temps obsessively online, bringing out a little OCD.


I have not done nearly enough to plan my nutrition and work everything out in practice.
I have done the work to prepare and am feeling pretty good about my foundation.

SO WHY AM I STILL SCARED???
There are time cutoffs. I thought this was a race til your done race. Nope. TIME. CUT. OFFS.
Swim in 1 1/4 hours? not a problem.
Off the bike by 1pm? I don't see an issue.
Complete the run by 3:30? Crap. I am totally shitting bricks about it.

What can I do about it now? Absolutely nothing now. So I will give it a whirl and see where I land. If I don't make the cutoff, I guess I have something for Pigman next month.

The Saga Continues.......... that's craptastical!

So, my ITB area still hurts after todays run. That sucks. Ice, Ice, stretch, NSAIDS, and a couple days of rest and we'll hopefully see some improvement. It didn't bother me on the short run last night, but todays longer run really kicked it in. I think switching back to my old shoe brand helped, but was kind of like closing the barn door after the cows are out. Just.too.late.
I was looking at my volume totals for this month, and I think I see another major contributor. I increased my miles from 39.77 for March to 64.5 in April, compounded by outdoor mile volume actually doubling, which I am sure is harder on all my parts overall than the treddy or the elliptical.
27 days to the Madison Marathon. Crap. I sure hope I can hang in there and at least finish that beast.

Crazylegs

Saturday was our second attempt at running the Crazylegs Classic, an 8K to raise money for UW athletics. It is a HUGE event, with thousands of participants. I was nervous about it this year because my knee has been giving me so much trouble, so Wednesday, i took a little recovery run after my stupidity run on Monday. I wore my old Kayanos instead of the new Sauconys and ran a slow little 3 1/2 milers that felt pretty good. Slow, but good.
Friday night before bed, we got ready for the big day. Garmin charged? check. clothes ready? check. Ipod charged? Nope. I plugged it into the side of my computer and instantly got the blue screen of death and an error message. Restart. Got some weird Checkdisk thing that ran before booting, talking about repairing my puter and saying something about fixing orphaned files. Yikes. Long story short- after lots of farfling around, it was determined that I had bad sectors on my hard drive that crashed me and I.had.lost.everything......EVERYTHING. Crap.
Went to bed and woke up to near freezing temps and strong winds, a wind advisory. After postponing the decision to go or not, we finally got packed up and left. It was super windy and cold. We even saw a blackbird flying into the wind that was actually going backwards - no lie.
We got the car parked at Camp Randall and took the shuttle bus to the start on the capital square. the Farmers Market was in full swing, but it was just too cold to check it out while we waited for the start. We ended up loitering around inside the capital building, which was apparently the same idea a lot of other runners had since there were people everywhere and the line for the ladies room was a least 40 deep.
We finally got into the corral for our wave. We were in wave DD, which I thought was funny - my former bra size. We finally got started about 40 minutes after the first wave. Got to high five lots of UW athletes, Bucky Badger, and Uncle Sam on stilts.
I knew I was in trouble about a mile in. My knee hurt. My left foot went numb. I walked Observatory Hill (yeah that hill totally bites.). I basically walked about 1/4-1/3 of every mile. I would run until pain or numbness made me slow to walk. And then there was the cold. And the 40 mph wind gusts. There were actually whitecaps on Lake Monona as we wound around the trail next to it.
As I got near the stadium, I tried to pick up the pace a bit. It hurt. I passes a couple of race walkers and a couple other hobbled up looking runners. As I rounded the corner to run down to the finish on the 50 yd line, the race walkers had started running and passed me. Crap.
I finished with a time of 1:07.26 per my Garmin. You can check out the graphs and data on BIM here. We were supposed to meet up with some of the SWAT peoples - Gary, Al, Brian, Anne, and whoever else was there. We looked and looked and couldn't find them anywhere. Crap.
My official finish: 1:07.26 .... overall 10095/10174, age group 1212/1221. Last years time was 54:32, so this year took me an extra 12.5 minutes. that sucks.

I have been reflecting on what happened to cause the problems in my knee lately. I haven't really changed a lot. I have increased training volume, but really not enough to trigger this. My biggest issues seem to have surfaced in the past several weeks, which coincides with purchasing new shoes - a new brand and style, the Saucony Triumph 5. When I ran in my old Kayanos earlier this week, I had no trouble. I really can't continue to use the old shoes as they are definitely too worn to sustain much more mileage. So I think it is reasonable to buy a new pair of Kayanos and see if that doesn't improve the situation. It really can't make it worse. And I do have a marathon to run in 1 month. I don't think I have much choice than to give it a shot.

Mikey got my puter working sort of again, but she is limping. The sector that housed all my personal data was totally wiped and I have to build a new profile from scratch for everything. It wiped out everything, so anything I have done since I backed up last week is gone. Worst of all there are things that were only on my PC, like the templates for the SWAT team website, among other things. If you sent me email this week and I didn't respond, that's why - sorry. Ratfinkie. I hate it, now I don't trust my computer and am going to think she will screw up at any second.

The wait is Over

We got a chance to speak to Nick yesterday and to my relief no one had hacked him up and buried him in the backyard, he is alive and apparently OK, living with his friend and some other people in UP Michigan, population 2000. I was able to tell him all the essential info I thought he needed to have as an adult living in the world on his own (health insurance, car insurance, and whatnot...). We even offerred to mail him some things he left behind, like all of his underwear and socks if he would give us an address to mail it all to.
From what he says he has an address, but couldn't recall what it was ...... AND he has enrolled himself in the high school (I checked - there is only 1 jr/sr high in town) and he wasn't sure what the name of the school he was now going to was....... so I'm not exactly sure what's up but my bullshit meter is alarming full tilt. Maybe he is going to Riverdale High with Archie and Jughead.... I'm pretty sure that was an imaginary high school too.
At any rate, the lines of communication are open again hopefully, which I am grateful for.

So here is my public service message for the day: Remember this when you are looking at that sweet little child with the halo hanging from his head........ Someone once told me this and I thought it would never apply to me but it applies to everyone eventually I've come to believe.
"Little kids, little problems; big kids, BIG problems."

Thanks Ekim

Today was a rough day for me.

I miss my son every day and I wish he would call and let me know he's OK. It for whatever reason was an incredibly hard morning for me, and once I got to work, I ended up in a heap of tears at my desk. My boss happened to walk into my office about the time I was melting into a puddle of goo. As I sat with her trying to pull myself back together, a bundle of roses arrived. A few people asked what the occasion was, and my first thought was "my husband thinks I am having a complete mental breakdown and is trying to head it off at the pass."

I have the best husband on earth.

By the way, thanks for the supportive comments and emails. I was not able to respond to everyone - either because I couldn't email you a reply or because it was all feeling too raw - but know that I appreciate you guys.

Run Vs Nap

Yesterday was a rest day for me. And I really needed one - sucky work day/week, lots of teenage 18-itis drama again, and just plain tired.

Today I woke up with a wild hair up my ass, and was just grouchy, mostly about all of the above still. We did some running around with Cheesy Beefy getting him some stuff - a couple pairs of shorts and a pair of throwing shoes (He is out for track for shot/discus). Did you know there were special shoes for the shotput?? I had no idea.

I knew I had a longish slower run on my plan today, but by 4pm I had talked myself into a little predinner nap. My big bed was calling me. As I sat on the edge of the bed thinking about hitting the pillow, guilt got the best of me and I laced up the running shoes and hit the road. Nothing real special to brag about or anything other than it was really kinda COLD out (38 degrees), but I got my big butt off the bed and got outside.

The battle: Nap vs Run.

The winner: I think it's a draw.

I Tell Myself the Burn is a Good Thing

I won't hold y'all in suspense - I did not blow off my weekly long run for the first time since Christmas. Mike and I did 2 hours of running at YMCA indoor track at 15 laps per mile. My footpod read 8.6 miles, but it felt like 86, so we called it at 2 hours. We got to see 4 PeeWee basketball games from the track in addition to listening to lots of tunes on the ipod.

I have been using the footpod I ordered for my Forerunner. It has 3 places to attach it to your shoe and up until this point, I only had it fastened at 2 points which i thought was fine and made it easier to switch between shoes. I have been feeling pretty fast lately, but after Mondays run it was giving me 9:30 pace miles and I knew I was not going that fast. So I made a few adjustments, attached the pod with zip ties nice and snug, and Voila! I am once again back to 12 something miles. Bummer. had I left well enough alone it probably would have told me I ripped out 9 minute miles and covered many more miles that I did on that Saturday run.

Today my body is punishing me for blowing off 8 long runs. My quads are killing me. It of course did not help that I had to cover yet another NOC shift (it really blows to be the boss lady these days) last night so my post-run recovery nurtition was off and I have had only a little bit of sleep so the muscles have not had much of a chance to recover properly. And they are letting me know it. All. Day. Long.

Repeat after me: Pain is weakness leaving the body.

Yeah, I'm not sure I buy it either, but whatever gets you through the day.

A Visit from Snow Miser (or, alternatively, why my husband is a giant tool)

So, anyone out there hear that we got a little snow in Wisconsin and the surrounding states this week? 20 inches in old Janesville to be exact. I am definitely ready for a visit from the Heat Miser again. His brother the Snow guy is a real dick.

My oldest son turned 18 over the weekend, accompanied by some 18-itis drama that has leveled out as the week has gone on. When the hell did I get so old and why don't I feel like it?

Tuesday evening the snow started. I ended up on the night shift AGAIN covering call ins (WTF! Am I the only nurse who works there??). I took with me a lot of caffeinated items and enough base layer and wool socks to be able to manage the 1.8 mile walk home in the snow if my clown car wasn't up to the job in the morning in the throes of a major snowstorm. Thankfully I made it home in the Matrix after a very very tiring night, and the snow was flying hardcore still. There were several inches on the ground already, with many many more to come. School was cancelled. I got my car stuck in the snow in the driveway trying to pull into the garage and needed a push from behind. I finally crawled into bed about 0730. At about 0815 or so, I awoke to the sound of the neighbor on his 4-wheeler. After briefly thinking I must have been dreaming and putting my head back on the pillow, I heard it again. Yep. Since there was so much snow that the plows were on a "main streets only" mission (I live on a 1 block long cul de sac, not exactly a traffic hub....) he had decided that he would work on plowing our street himself on his ATV with the plow mount. Which he did. ALL. FREAKING. DAY. I laid there listening to him until about 10, when I finally realized sleeping was something that would not happen. I decided I would get up and just go to bed super early that night. I got up and looked outside. Holy Snowdrifts Batman. I opened the french door to let the dogs out, only to be met by a hip-high drift across the back yard ending at the door. Daisy gave me a "yeah right ma" look and turned around to head for the living room. Maddy bounded out of the house like her pants were on fire. The snow was over her head, so pretty much all you saw was a dog hopping up from out of the snow looking like Tigger in figure-8 hot laps around the yard. So yeah, I guess the first order of business was to dig the dogs a potty tunnel.

Nick had ordered a pizza delivery and after 2 hours of waiting for Pizza Hut to arrive, they called back and said that just wasn't gonna happen. You can pick it up though. Nick picked up the keys to the Cavalier and said "watch me laugh at them when I can get through and they couldn't." I watched out the back window for him to go up the road, and never did see him. Curious, I went to the front window to find out where he went and there he was, stuck with snow over the wheel wells, spinning his tires in the ice and snow and getting stucker by the moment. I think he made it about 5 feet out of the driveway.... so I guess he really showed them. While Lucas and I put on our boots and coats, the neighbors helped him push his car back into the driveway. I went the door and see Nick made it into the driveway. Backwards. And was now spinning his wheels at the end of the driveway trying to gun it for the house on a patch of ice. We dug for a while then the Beefy brothers and several neighbors got us pushed back further inthe driveway where we were stuck again. Although mostly sideways and definietly still backwards, at least we were far enough back that the plow wouldn't hit the nose of the car on the slim chance it passed. We gave up and decided to atack it later.

Deciding to wait out the snow a bit longer, we went inside. I picked up, mopped, vacuumed, etc for a couple hours then we headed back out to attack the car. It was still falling fast but we had to do something. We quick blew and shoveled from the back of the car to the garage, salted under the wheels and back to the house. I threw her in reverse and the boys pushed. We finally got her back inside the garage. We blew the driveway out. I went out back and attacked making a poop tunnel for the dogs to use. Before long Lucas comes to the back door and hands me the phone. It was work.

"So you're gonna be here at 6 right?"

"Excuse me?"

"Didn't (boss) call you? She said you were supposed to come in. Nellie NOC Nurse lives in the country and they just closed her road. She can't get in."

(I am not sure when I became the only person capable of working something other than my regular schedule, but apparently I am. And I guess now I don't even get asked, I get told, in this case not even told, this time I was to know by TELEPATHY. Nice. Lord knows I AM known for my telepathic powers. )

So, in my clown car, on terrible roads, with no sleep, and having shoveled all flipping day, I headed off for the NOC shift. AGAIN! (That is I think 6 in 2 weeks if anyone is counting by the way. ) A perfect end to Super Gay Wednesday.

One of the day nurses came in at 4 when her hubby got home from work. When I got done kissing and hugging her for saving my sleepy ass, I gave report and headed home to crawl into the nest to sleep. I pull in at 4AM to find Mikes snowmobile in the spot where his car should be. Apparently he couldn't drive home.

Of course, Mike was snowmobiling during all of this. I guess he thinks it's super fair for every one in the house to pitch in and do their fair share of dealing with the plethora of work that needs to be done when we get that much snow. Everyone except him that is. He owns a snowmobile, which gives him the right to play on it whenever he wants to, especially when there is hard work to be done around the house. Man work. The kind he left his wife to do.

As we - the boys and I - were clearing the car earlier for our last run at righting her from the snowbank one of the said "this would be a perfect example fo teamwork, except one of our teammates is absent." Yeah, couldn't have said that better myself.

Today, I got up about 1100, ate a little something and headed outside again to finish up. The snow had finally stopped. The final damage..... 20-21 inches of fresh powder in 24 hours, nearly breaking the record set in 1984. Since we are surrounded by farm fields, we had a lot of big drifts to knock down too, some of them waist high or better. I blew off the big cement porch out back so my doggies can pee. I dug out the exhaust pipe for the furnace. I dug out the dryer vent so I can dry clothes. I shoveled a path to the front door. I blew out the driveway a total of 3 times today. I cleared the approach to the mailbox so the mailman will stop. I dug a path from the street to the fire hydrant and dug a circle all around it to the grass so we are incompliance with code. All in all, I spent the bulk of my day freezing my big fat ass off either with a shovel in my hand or trying to wrangle a snowblower that is too big for me to manage without throwing my whole body into it and using every ounce of energy I have. Hours later, when it was all done I came in the house and crumbled into a broken down heap on the couch.

The phone rings.

"Uh hi, I'm going snowbiling after work."

I hung up.

Of course he is. Why would anyone think maybe he might come home and give his family a hand with the hard work, or at least have offerred? What a giant tool.

So here is the short list of the things I have learned this winter, especially today:

- to operate the snowblower: It's physically hard. It's too big for me. But I can get it started and I can do it. Like a single woman.

- to get a stuck car out of the snow. Not just once, but three -count em- three times. Without a husband in sight. Just like a single woman.

- to manage to work an ungodly amount of sucky hours while simultaneously making sure the kids and dogs are adequately accomodated. All by myself. Like a single mom.

- to fix things that go wrong around the house. All.by.myself. Like a single woman.

- to keep myself entertained, during endless hours that I am left alone while the other people that live here find better things to do. I can entertain myself rather well, just like a single woman.

I'm thinking the take home message here is I get better and better at being single every snowy day. Maybe before long I will be. I sure hope riding that bitch Polly Polaris is just that wonderful. And worth it.

Totally Discombobulated

The past few days have been a complete blur. Last week, I put in a lot of longer days early in the week, so I left work early (about 2pm) to make a total of about 46 hours in for the week. Before I left, I called to verify that the agency I scheduled to staff that evening still had my nurse on their schedule and I was ASSURED that she would be there for the 6-6 shift. ASSURED. Had a nice afternoon with Mike running around town, then hopped on the spinner for a nice long workout. About 2 minutes after I got going, the phone rang - the 6-6 night nurse didn't show up. Choice. As usual, no one was available or answering their phones to cover the shift. One of my pool nurses did agree to cover the shift until midnight, then I went in at midnight to finish out the shift. I would like to thank this SUCKY agency who I will respectfully not name (Staff One Staffing Network - OK I lied) for the most tired I have been in a while. It made for a long day - got up at 4am Friday, worked, worked out, worked again, then finally got to go to bed about 730 Saturday morning. Major Suckage, I wont lie. I actually walked the unit halls from 0330-0430 because I was afraid if I sat down I might go to sleep. I was whooped by the time I got my crack into the sack and slept for a few hours until about 1230. The thing with working nights is I never know what to do for sleep. I'm not used to them so I don't sleep well, and I don't want to sleep a full 8 or I wont get to sleep that night and get back to normal. The I walk around in a giddy daze until its bedtime again.

Saturday was really a wash. I slept til 1230, then got up tried to shake the fog off, dinked around the house and then we watched movies for awhile, then went to bed. I was scheduled for a 10 mile run according to plan, but just couldn't do it - it was freezing-brrr cold out and I felt like a limp dishrag.

Sunday I was feeling back to normal again finally. Got in 99 minutes on the elliptical as hard as I could go (that's the highest it will let me go - apparently the machine is anti-triple digits). Not quite my 10 miler, but punishment enough.

Monday, I was off to make up for the night shift and the 53 hour work week last week. Yahoo! I slept in, puttered around the house a while, then climbed on the spinner. Mike and I were planing to go run at the Y that night for the 2 hours Lucas had drivers ed, so was going to get in some good solid activity hours. No sooner did I climb on the spinner, the phone rang. It was my boss. The NOC nurse had called in sick. Might want to prepare to work tonight, its not looking promising for a replacement. Crap. Crappity crap crap. Since there was really nothing I could do, I got back on the bike and did spinning drills for the next 2+ hours. I got in to work at 6pm to report for a 12 hours shift. I was having a really hard time keeping track of timelines. Mrs so-and-so has a procedure on Wednesday - tomorrow right? Well in a couple hours tomorrow will be Wednesday, but for right now tomorrow is Tuesday. I had several conversations like that during that shift. That's where NOC shift gets weird. Tomorrow is tomorrow except when it really is another day forward and yesterday is subjective too. Totally confusing. Did I mention the night shift I worked Monday was also a full moon? That's never good - makes for a crazy night. Anyone that says the full moon stuff isn't true has never worked one with patients, its all true, every last word.

Got home at 7am and instead of going to bed, I had to wait up a little bit since school was delayed an hour due to getting 8 inches of snow (blech). Got the kids up at 0730, asked them to please let the dogs out of my room when they came home for lunch (so they wouldn't wake me up) and headed to the nest. Slept. like. crap. They were plowing the parking lot behind us (that one no one uses. ever. ) for hours. Once I finally got sleeping good, the boys were home for lunch, With their friends. The loud boys slammed things around the kitchen. They talked in their loudest outside voices. NO ONE came to let the dogs out of my room as planned. Pretty soon I hear someone yell "Hey - isn't your mom trying to sleep?!?!?!" Uh yeah, I was. Not so much anymore. So after a whopping 3 hours in bed I staggered downstairs to the kitchen where food was flying out of the cupboard faster than I even thought possible. The microwave was going, the pizza oven was cooking, the quesadilla grill was oozing cheese out the side. I let the dogs out and waited for the loud boys to leave so I could try to go back to sleep. I tried to go back to bed for an hour or so, without any luck. So I got up and plopped my tired butt onto the sofa and caught up with my bloggie buddies everywhere.

When Mike got home, he wanted to go to the Y to run. I wanted to curl up in a ball and go to bed. He won. We ran an easy 4 at the indoor track and I am glad I did. It was the first time for the Garmin footpod, and I was pleased with not having to count out 15 laps to the mile. It makes the time just fly by not having to be painfully aware of each and every lap. What I like about running indoors there is that there are usually a few people running or walking the track when we get there. We run. Some people leave. We keep running. More people show up, walk a couple laps or run them. We keep running. It feel good to see them all leave while we keep going, until they are all gone and we are the only ones left. I might be slow, but I can outlast them all when the distance gets long.

Today I am off work again, the last of my time to make up for the extra night shift before heading back tomorrow. I finally feel like my head is on straight again. I am fixing to get on the spinner for a couple of hours, but I am little scared. The pattern the past week has been climb on, spin for 5, pick up the phone and get called in to work NOCS. Send me good vibes people - I can't take another one right now!

Taking my life in my Hands

Today, I spent the day trying to figure out if it were possible to run outside. I scoped out the sidewalks and streets as I drove to work. I checked out the windows of the 5th Floor where I work. How icy is too icy? How well did my friends and neighbors shovel? Saturday we got dealt an icy mess. First there was snow. Followed by sleet, then freezing rain, then slush. Made for a yucky slippery mess, and people did their best to scrape the crap off their walks with varying degrees of success. (mini RANT: I can't stand it when people think it's OK to not shovel at all - no attempt- I know you were home, I saw your tire tracks!! Just plain lazy and dangerous!)

I am also working on a training plan to get ready for my first marathon in May and them 2 Half-Irons later in the summer. The training plan started um.... yesterday. What did I do yesterday? A whole lot of nothing. I went shopping and folded laundry, but I don't think that qualifies as cardio. So today I was itching to do something - I can't get off track ALREADY!

When I got home from work, I made the decision to run outside. I laced up the kicks, bundled up and took off, flashers on my arm bands and miners light in my back pocket. Much of the run I had to run in the street, although the parking lanes were mostly as icy as the walkways . I had to slow down lots not because I was tired, but because I didn't want to spin ass over teakettle down the sidewalk like a curling stone. My goal pace according to RWOL Smart Coach was 13:19/mi (I think that's wrong - don't think even I can run that slow), so my 12:04 avg pace was not too bad. Actually it wasn't too bad for me WITHOUT the ice lately......

When I got home, I got my butt cheeks thawed out, then hopped on the spinner to make up for a part of yesterday's planned bike that I blew off. Punished myself for another half hour or so with some drills : sprints, SLPs, standups, and so on.

Tomorrow: SWAT swim

Wed: Another after work run (Supposed to snow, so maybe will try spin class instead)

Thurs: SWAT swim

Fri: Spinner and yoga

Sat/Sun: Some other sort of self-punishment for extended periods of time - a long run and bike of some sort.

Ugh..... a sick day

We seriously need to have a discussion about what I meant when I said it is just polite to share. I really didn't mean to have head colds included in that sharing thing. Please file that one for future reference. Also exclude other fun stuff like cholera, TB, hepatitis........... I think you get the idea.

This is what I feel like today so I am going to load up on Zicam and Aireborne and head to bed.

Veronica Rides Again

Went with Mike tonight to ride the mountain bike trails at Rockport Park with Regina. We rode for a while together on the single track but I found myself walking my bike along the trail more than I was riding it. Mike was doing awesome riding with Regina so I split from them and rode some of the wider trails by myself and let them tackle to single tracks on their own. I had a good ride and regained some of that confidence back, since I hadn't taken Veronica (my witchy mtn bike that kicks me off her regularly) for a ride since like July. I actually got off the wide grassy paths after a while and tackeld the narrower dirt trails, not quite single track but getting closer. Baby steps.
I'll keep working on it but I can't promise I will ever be good at it. I might learn to bounce well.