So, took a 6 mile run today. Here are the random thoughts the marbles knocked loose:
* Ever get a song stuck in your head and it won't fall back out? It has a name - "Ear Worm". I read it in USA today. True Story. Mine today is Paranoia by Green Day.
* I have an irrational fear of Schnauzers. I saw one today on my run that barked and snapped at me and I nearly peed myself. Other dogs? All Cool. I blame the Sheridans and their devil schnauzer Ollie, who I swear might tear your arm off.
* Why do people insist on using those wimpy retractable leashes?? Like they are really going to be able to keep their dog from lunging at me or keep them from wrapping their leash cord around my legs and giving me a rope burn. A leash is meant to tether and control your dog, not to make you tiny yippy dog look like a yoyo on a string. ARGHH!
* Speaking of dogs, I am tired of coming home to a wet spot on the couch where the dogs have been licking their butt while I'm at work. Stay.Off.The.Furniture. Why is that so hard??
* I have no idea how I would ever be able to run with a running group, I am so flipping slow. I would get dropped like a bad habit pretty much immediately.
* Today, I ran 6 miles. It felt like shit, I did a lot of run/walking and longggggggg traffic stops at corners. Somehow, it was my fastest pace yet recently and was TWO.MINUTES. per mile faster than my plan's goal pace. TWO. per MILE. That is totally odd, but I'll take it where I can get it.
* Wanna make a beautician speechless? Try asking them you miss getting perms and wonder what their thoughts are. The look on their face is priceless. I have said that to 3 different beauticians lately, and they all gave me the same look. Guess that is a no.........rats.
* It's scary how close I am to having a household where everyone is over 18. really? How did I stay so young when everyone around me got so damn OLD??
* Kids are awesome. I pass this trio of 7ish year olds on the hill in front of Cozy acres most days on my runs. They are usually standing at the top of the hill racing in some form- running, biking, skateboards, etc. They are good about seeing me trucking up the hill and they wait for me to get past them before they blow the whistle and take off. It's totally cute. The last few times, they have drawn a bike course in chalk going down the hills with several start and finish lines marked and the path they drew itself has all kinds of zigzags and right angles. Anyone who could navigate that course, my hat is off to you. I personally would break my neck. :)
* Their parents are not, however. Last week, I saw a 6ish year old blow through a stop sign on a busy-ish street. He didn't look around at all, wasn't wearing a helmet, and was barefoot. I politely scolded him in my best Mom voice and said "You really should wear a helmet and shoes, you could really get hurt!". His mother walked up form behind and yelled at me, "Mind your own business, bitch." Nice parenting. Fail.
* Loving the weather. It was 78 degrees and sunny this afternoon. I ran in short sleeves and capris and was roasting. Summer, I love you.
Friday Funny 1403: Parenting Funnies
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